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Space Forum / Shuttle / November 2006Does the space shuttle have any weapons???
Just in case UFOs attack, dangerous aliens from the Planet X. Can the space shuttle defend itself or will the aliens destroy the shuttle and eat all the astronauts??? > Just in case UFOs attack, dangerous aliens from the Planet X. > > Can the space shuttle defend itself or will the aliens destroy the > shuttle and eat all the astronauts??? Yes. It has a fecal laser mounted on the side. Cheap and easy to use. :-) George > Yes. It has a fecal laser mounted on the side. Cheap and easy to > use. :-) Right. Scares the sh*t out of 'em ;-) /steen >> Yes. It has a fecal laser mounted on the side. Cheap and easy to >> use. :-) > > Right. Scares the sh*t out of 'em ;-) > > /steen Just aim and flush. George ROTFLMAO Damn George, you know how hard it is to get coffee out of a keyboard and off the screen? Warn me next time. Al G >> Just in case UFOs attack, dangerous aliens from the Planet X. >> [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > > George > ROTFLMAO > > Damn George, you know how hard it is to get coffee out of a keyboard and > off the screen? Warn me next time. > > Al G Sorry. I should have engaged the safety, first (make a note - never discharge a fecal laser in a crowded newgroup). Check! George >>> Just in case UFOs attack, dangerous aliens from the Planet X. >>> [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] >> >> George > Sorry. I should have engaged the safety, first (make a note - never > discharge a fecal laser in a crowded newgroup). Check! > > George Actually, the fecal laser was once used to direct a fecal bomb on Havana. According to Mike Mullane's book Riding Rockets, the commander on STS-27 (IIRC) waited until they were over Cuba to, uh, do his business. >> Sorry. I should have engaged the safety, first (make a note - never >> discharge a fecal laser in a crowded newgroup). Check! [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > on STS-27 (IIRC) waited until they were over Cuba to, uh, do his > business. That would explain Castro's current health problems. What a moving experience it must have been. George > Just in case UFOs attack, dangerous aliens from the Planet X. > > Can the space shuttle defend itself or will the aliens destroy the > shuttle and eat all the astronauts??? Oh, yeah, you can see the photon torpedos tubes in the shuttle nose. Badly, they have no reloads, so it willl be difficult to escape from a complete squadron of Klingon Bird of Prey Look here http://spaceflight.nasa.gov/gallery/images/shuttle/sts-121/hires/iss013e48787.jpg But seriously, if there was some UFO or something hurdling towards it, and the only way to stop it was to blast through it, would the shuttle have any sort of weapon or something to do it? Lets just pretend the thrusters failed so it couldn't move :D > But seriously, if there was some UFO or something hurdling towards it, Do you often write such blatant contradictions? Paul >> Can the space shuttle defend itself or will the aliens destroy the >> shuttle and eat all the astronauts??? There is only one shuttle left that has laser weapoons on it. It was the one used by James Bond when he escaped from that large Drax Industries space station and destroyed the bio-weapons of mass destruction on their way to exterminate humanity and he saved the world. Last time that shuttle was seen was when it was still on orbit and James Bond turned off the camera because he was busy with the bond girl in the aft cabin. So it is not clear where it landed and what happened to it. But it is not in NASA's fleet of shuttles. No self respecting alien would come near the shuttle, think of all that junk that falls off....:-) Brian  SignatureBrian Gaff....Note, this account does not accept Bcc: email. graphics are great, but the blind can't hear them Email: briang1@blueyonder.co.uk ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________ > Just in case UFOs attack, dangerous aliens from the Planet X. > > Can the space shuttle defend itself or will the aliens destroy the > shuttle and eat all the astronauts??? > Just in case UFOs attack, dangerous aliens from the Planet X. Fortunately aliens are such bad pilots (remember, there are six or seven crash sites at Roswell, for example), that they wouldn't get close to the shuttle before they crashed. Mark In all seriousness, there is no reason why the shuttle commander shouldn't keep a revolver as a function of his authority. Its routine in Hollywood space operas ever since "Rocketship X-M." |
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