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Space Forum / Astronomy / February 2007"Colonel Jake'sters - Official FAQ for Kooks Awards & Offices - website!!! (fully functional with audio option, intended for High Speed Internet)..."
COlOnel Jake Enterprises® Presents http://www.coloneljake.com/AUK/ -- ¸,.,¸,., :HaHaHa ```````''' {°v°} '''´´´´´´´ `^'^´~`' ,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,., :VK all the way ```````''' {°v°} '''´´´´´´´ `^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^ .,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,. :Colonel Jake (TM) ```````''' {°v°} '''´´´´´´´ `^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~` http://www.coloneljake.com http://www.coloneljake.com/archives/01/ ¸,.,¸ :AUK: Goofy Azzed Babboon, Sep 05 `^'^´ http://www.coloneljake.com/pages/page001/ ¸,.,¸ :AUK: Unabomber Surprise, Apr 06 `^'^´ http://www.coloneljake.com/pages/page002/ ¸,.,¸ :AUK: Bolo Bullis Foam Duck #20, Apr 06 `^'^´ http://www.coloneljake.com/pages/page003/ ¸,.,¸ :AUK: Bob Allisat Memorial Hook, Line & Sinker, May 06 `^'^´ http://www.coloneljake.com/pages/page004/ ¸,.,¸ :AUK: Barbara Woodhouse Memorial Dog Whistle, May 06 `^'^´ trained by Pinku-Sensei http://www.coloneljake.com/pages/page005/ ¸,.,¸,.,¸,.,¸,.,¸,.,¸,.,¸,.,¸,.,¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸, »»»xXx««« ko( o )kY b( O )ogers »»»xXx««« `^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´ http://www.coloneljake.com/AUK/ ,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,., Nada???,...., ain't got shite from AFA-B yet ??? `^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`' ,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,. «,» AUK's der'any RAMD'sters go home «,» `^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~ ,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,. ®©2007 Colonel Jake Enterprises, L.L.C. Colonel Jake is a registered trademark of Colonel Jake Enterprises, L.L.C. All rights reserved. `^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~ ¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸¸,.,¸,.,¸ I'll say whatever I flockin' want!!! ```````'''··°v°··'''´´´´´´´ ^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^´^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^'^´~`^ "Mine's better than?!?!?!,...., CABALLISTA's!!!..." (unless you're a Dialup Mutha Fucka) AUK's der Official FAQ for Kook Awards & Office Holders Main Menu http://www.caballista.org/auk/ ¸,.,¸ :And then some... `^'^´ > COlOnel Jake Enterprises® > Presents > http://www.coloneljake.com/AUK/ Joey "Colonel Jake" Jimenez, a mere bugle-boy posing as a faux 'officer', is hereby crowned with the Tinfoil Sombrero. {I'll let your Master, Pinku-Sensei, explain it to you. You don't deserve a proper ceremony.} also.... I hereby nominate Joey "Colonel Jake" Jimenez for Golden Killfile. Any seconds (and snores?) for the Golden Killfile nomination? > ¸,.,¸,., >:HaHaHa ```````''' {°v°} '''´´´´´´´ [quoted text clipped - 65 lines] >:And then some... > `^'^´  SignatureOfficial FAQ for Alt.Usenet.Kooks: http://www.caballista.org/auk COOSN-266-06-58907 Skepticult: 618-90140-613 Hammer of Thor - August 2005 Pierre Salinger Memorial HL&S awards - 3/2005, 7/2005, 8/2005, 8/2006 I was busily flonking away in AUK, when The Goddess Eris Herself suddenly made me reply to Friendly Neighbourhood Vote Wrangler: >> COlOnel Jake Enterprises® >> Presents [quoted text clipped - 11 lines] > > Any seconds (and snores?) for the Golden Killfile nomination? Oh, seconded, I suppose, if no one has beaten me to the punch. [If the latter occasion is the case, then I do hereby nominate Mike "miguel" Cranston for the GK. Seconds?] Signature________________________________________________________________________ Hail Eris! All hail Discordia!! Kallisti!!! mhm 29x21; Chung Convict #78 Pope Snarky Goodfella of the undulating cable, JM, CK, POEE, KOTHASK, GGGHD, HCNB, IAC, MWFA COOSN-029-06-71069 WINNERS! Usenet Kook Awards, January 2007 MID: <Xns98D232E44C01pinkusenseinetcabalc@204.153.244.170> Email popesnarky *at* gmail.com I want a boyfriend who is sensitive and caring, but they already have boyfriends. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Cabal_of_the_Holy_Pretzel/join "I hate explain $hit to tards. Especially illiterate tards." -- The Monkey is very hard on irony meters, as in MID: <Tc4xh.657$hH2.432@trnddc02> "email is not a private form of communication." -- Dustin Cook, in Message-ID: <1157484607.556401.25070@h48g2000cwc.googlegroups.com> "Dustin is FILTH in my opinion. And not for any reason other than posting Rhonda's personal info." -- Respondant "After the Swift Boat Veterans who served with Kerry in Vietnam claimed that Kerry lied about his heroism, the Democrats wanted to make a similar ad attacking Bush, but they couldn't find anyone who served with him." -- Anonymous "You would no longer be here if I were to stop praying for you." Andrew B. Chung's delusions of grandeur are getting out of hand, in MID: <1160653810.937331.31980@e3g2000cwe.googlegroups.com> You're fighting a Spam Witch You look into this seductive creature's eyes and feel as if she can make your sword longer, your bank account bigger, your waist smaller, and show you the secret habits of barnyard animals. You fight to resist her charms . . . She gets the jump on you. She shows you a picture of her pet goat. "This is my goat, see?" she says. Dear god, the horror. Ooh! Ugh! Ouch! Oof! Oof! You lose 17 hit points. (bad spelling damage) -- The Kingdom of Loathing >> COlOnel Jake Enterprises® >> Presents [quoted text clipped - 5 lines] > {I'll let your Master, Pinku-Sensei, explain it to you. You don't > deserve a proper ceremony.} "Tinfoil Sombrero An executive award, a Vote Wrangler's privilege, to grant to those out there who would seek to overthrow the Friendly Neighborhood dictatorship of this froup. Time and again various Kooks have attempted to either hijack the awards, start votes of their own, or give the FNVW a free non-expenses- paid ticket to the Motel Deep 6. This should never go unpunished. Such insubordination goes beyond the normal bounds of those wacko enough to wear the tinfoil hat, therefore, the FNVW shall have the privilege of granting the TINFOIL SOMBRERO, upon receipt of substantial enough evidence of said insubordination." Joey, you almost got this award for having the temerity to mirror the old official site, plagiarizing co-FNVW Sean Monaghan's work. What saved you until now was that you made no overt claims that it was the official AUK site for all this time, even though you offered it to me in case I wanted to make it one. Note that I did not respond; I would rather run AUK with no website than with a website that was part of a kook's site (and you are a recognized net.kook). I gather that you didn't get the hint. What /did/ get you the award was that, once Sean came up with a new official site, you hotlinked to it (so you knew there was an official site) and then made what looked like a claim that your site was also an official one (the page even says Alt.Usenet.Kooks - Official FAQ). Tsk, tsk. Enjoy your new headgear! > also.... > > I hereby nominate Joey "Colonel Jake" Jimenez for Golden Killfile. > > Any seconds (and snores?) for the Golden Killfile nomination? Pope Snarky has already seconded this nomination. I'll add two more. For being a questionable source of information, including information contrary to fact, I nominate Joey "Colonel Jake" Jimenez to run against Azure for the Office of Kooki Information Minister. Seconds? Also, Colonel Jake appears to satisfy the requirements for the Looney Maroon. Let's see if he satisfies the criteria on the checklist. "The Looney Maroon Award is given based on the amount of childish, nonsensical, funny and downright ludicrous behaviour exhibited over a particular month. It is not meant to award the greatest overall Kook for that time, but is meant as a recognition of outstandingly looney behaviour by an individual or group, real or anonymous, animate or robotic. Nominees from Usenet and beyond are eligible." To win the LMA, a candidate must most strongly meet a majority of the following criteria: * Show intelligence off the deep end of the bell curve Yes. * Consistently say things that are hideously nonsensical Yes. * Prove themselves wrong while pretending to be an 'expert' Yes * Exhibit a passion for metaphorically banging their head against a wall Yes. * Be profoundly ignorant Yes. * Persistently refuse to allow themselves to be enlightened Sometimes. In this case, it's true. * Demonstrate a gift for false prophecy Colonel Jake makes predictions? * Regularly cite questionable sources of information as 'fact' This is why he's being nominated. Colonel Jake does qualify, so I also nominate him for the Looney Maroon. Seconds? SignaturePinku-Sensei Co-FNVW of AUK http://www.caballista.org/auk/index.html >>> COlOnel Jake Enterprises® >>> Presents [quoted text clipped - 100 lines] > > Seconds? Joey Crackpipes is hereby seconded for the LMA. SignatureOfficial FAQ for Alt.Usenet.Kooks: http://www.caballista.org/auk COOSN-266-06-58907 Skepticult: 618-90140-613 Hammer of Thor - August 2005 Friendly Neighbourhood Vote Wrangler : >>> COlOnel Jake Enterprises® : >>> Presents [quoted text clipped - 102 lines] : : Joey Crackpipes is hereby seconded for the LMA. Thank you so very, very much?, "COOOOOSN!!!..." |
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