Space Forum / Astronomy / March 2006

On Mar 30, 2006, at 7:22 PM, Jack Sarfatti wrote:

Chevalier J.P. Marshall just back from Shangri-La reports his
translations of an ancient ET manuscript:

On Mar 30, 2006, at 6:09 PM, John Paul Marshall wrote:

Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin
to itch or you'll have to go to the bathroom

Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner

Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the
stupidity of our act

Law of the Telephone:
If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal

Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire,
the very next morning you will have a flat tire

Variation Law:
If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start
to move faster than the one you are in now (works every time)

Law of the Bath:
When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases
when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with

Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will

Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach

Law of the Theatre:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last

Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you
to do something which will last until the coffee is cold

Murphy's Law of Lockers:
If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent
lockers

Law of Rugs/Carpets:
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor
covering
are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug

Law of Location:
No matter where you go, there you are

Law of Logical Argument:
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about

Brown's Law:
If the shoe fits, it's ugly

Oliver's Law:
A closed mouth gathers no feet

Wilson's Law:
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it